My 14th smile is a shootout winner.

Had a ton of fun with two of the besties last night and the Blue Jackets beat the Red Wings 3-2 in a shootout, it doesn't get much better than that. I was extremely tired last night and didn't have time to write my smile before I passed out, so I guess this is kind of a makeup smile, so to speak. I'm grinning right now though, and will write my real smile for the 15th later tonight. I'm still going after two weeks, even if I'm posting from my phone :p I'm proud of myself. Hope you're all doing well today!

-Eli

13 smiles. This will be a short one.

I am smiling today because no matter how miserable I may get, no matter how wronged I may become, no matter how treacherous it will be battling the battle I'm about to rage, I can look at my life and say one thing:

I never have to go back to Friendship Village of Columbus ever again.

Good night.

-Eli

The 12th smile is a mellow high made of jello limbs.

I don't know what else to say today. It wasn't a particularly great day, my shoulder hurts and everybody, everybody EVERYBODY has constant advice for me. Listening to so many different people tell me so many different ways to handle a situation is frustrating: I have a hard time multitasking, always have.

One thing? No problem.

Two things? I'm a little shaky, but it'll get done.

Three things? I start to vibrate.

I guess, in a way, it's comforting even though it's frustrating: while I'm getting stressed, it's nice to know that people care about me enough to try and help. I went to a reorientation at work today, came home, took one of my muscle relaxers and descended into a flopsy-limbed nap that relieved some of my troubles.

So basically, as I sit here trying to shrug off what I'm absolutely certain is enough muscle relaxant to tranq a horse, I wanted to smile and thank you all for caring so much about me. So much <3 is always worth smiling about.

-Eli

I smiled today because tomorrow will be better.

I was curious how I was going to handle a bad day on here, when I finally had one. When I really had absolutely nothing to smile about, what was going to happen?

Today was one of those days. Today at work, a violent coworker grabbed my by the head (the head? wtf? WHO THROWS A SHOE HONESTLY) and proceeded to make me feel like hamburger meat. If I wasn't a little luckier I'd probably look like it, too. But that's ok. You know why?

I'm the bigger man. I have the better plan, and I'm more than willing to execute it. But this project isn't about bad smiles. Smiling about revenge is not being happy.

I'm smiling, in the end, because anything could be better than the day I had today. I'm just sayin.

<3,
Eli

The Tenth Day: I busted my butt and laughed it off.

So. Money.

It's a bad thing for me. I never really handle money particularly well. I like shiny things too much, don't like bills enough, and generally have enough left after two weeks to eat. Sometimes.

Actually, "eat" is such a strong term. "Survive?" "Not starve?" Lets just say I've lost a bit of weight. Anyway, that's not what this is about. Today, I woke up late (no work, whee!) stumbled out of bed, and sat down in my directors chair...which abruptly ceased to be. I'd seen this coming for a while, but I like to use something until I can't use it anymore so I stuck with this chair, a 4 dollar number I bought at a thrift store a few months ago. It was comfy, I liked it, whatever.

So I'm laying there on the floor in the remnants of a chair, laughing hysterically as I pull a chunk of wood out of my arm (not hurt that bad, I'll live, no worries)and I just think to myself "oh well, I'll buy a new one eventually."

Then I checked my bank account and realized since I got my student loans squared away, paid all my last months bills on time and settled with Discover card, I had 300 dollars sitting around. I can actually buy a new chair. I don't have to worry about taping this one back together, or pulling my couch up to my desk just to use my computer for a few weeks. This is substantial and awesome for me, it doesn't usually happen. Needless to say, I was incredibly excited, smiles as big as you can fathom inhabiting my face for the rest of the day. I may have actually weathered a good portion of my financial storm, and that's worth smiling about.

All because I fell and busted my ass. Funny how things work out.

-Eli-

PS: Decided to leave a cool video or some music everyday. That being said, my sister showed me this video: it's by a group called Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes, and they're pretty awesome. Check it out!

My 9th smile is dedicated entirely to shredding on the banjo.

Yeah, that's right, the banjo. Wanted to take a minute to talk about a group of people who have been integral to my happiness, hope you don't mind. They're called Mumford and Sons, and they're a british jam-band. I apologize if the idea of banjos sets your off musically, but I don't cater to everybody : P

Well, I guess I'm not just here to talk about the band. I'm more here to talk about music and it's effect on my life. I used to have a song for everything, you know? Playlists on the old musicmatch jukebox on our first computer that were hundreds of songs long. I loved punk and country, rock and roll and just enough R&B to shock people. Basically, I was a music fiend. My only pipedream was (and still is, sort of) starting a garage band. I used to dedicate songs to people, make them mixtapes, sing out loud in the shower/car/street, whatever. I remember buying my first CD ("Enema of the State" by Blink 182) and absolutely blasting it wherever I went. The day I discovered Napster was like a gift from above.

And sure, as I grew musical tastes changed, genres shifted, what was and wasn't popular continued to be dictated from somewhere unknown*. But the music was always there. Then one day, it just stopped.

Depression is a hell of a condition. I just want to put it out there.

It's even more difficult when you're alone.

It's incredibly diffcult in a new place.

It's impossible without music.

Well, probably not. I will say this about being sad, though: it steals from you. You can't be sad for long if you have what you love...but sometimes the sadness just takes and takes and there's nothing left. One bad thing is a ripple that becomes a wave that besets a maelstrom and suddenly you've long since drowned in a pool of thoughts: it's not an optimum place to be. It's not fun for me to talk about. But my sadness took my music. I don't really remember rocking out to much of anything, singing in the shower...anything; over the last year or so I've been silent musically. Even posting song lyrics (an old hobby) became a shell of it's former self.

Recently though, music has worked it's way back into my life, largely in part to a group of four rowdy Englishmen rocking out in the purest way possible. A friend showed me their most popular song, and to hear the passion of the music, to realize how much they loved what they were doing...it was incredible. It was like falling in love with an idea all over again, I went head over heels for music. And now here I am, with a media player queue about 40 songs long, listening to everything that carries a beat I can sway to. I sing along, even though my perpetual headphones (speakers are broken) make me sound completely ridiculous and more than a little obnoxious. Today at work (under some brilliant advice from a previously mentioned sister) I loudly sang along to everything I could think of as I washed the dishes. I've never had more fun at work.

It was there that I realized everybody has a song in their heart, and you have to do whatever you can to keep from silencing it. As for me, the ballad of my heart is back. It's quiet, but soon enough I feel I'll be raising hell in the best way, a raging paeon for the soul.

Basically, smile: You've got the music in you.

-Eli

*When you were little, did you ever wonder who decided what was popular? I always had this vision in my head of all the people more "cool" than me sitting around in a dark room somewhere deciding what I had to do to not get beat up.**

**They never seemed to tell me what that WAS precisely. Oh well.

PS: Onto the actual music! I feel like everybody should listen to one of these. Just give it a shot. "Little Lion Man" is not safe for work/Mormons, but everything else is peachy-keen.

Day 8: Thanks for the smile, sister.

I am a man blessed with many things. I'm even a man who is actually good at a few areas of life.

"Sisters" happens to be a category in which I excel.

Depending on your interpretation, I have either two sisters or six. I prefer the latter. As for how that works, it's a story for another day, which you'll undoubtedly hear...you know, there being 357 more stories to tell and all.

Anyway, today was a pretty rough day at work. Lots of stuff going on, lots of annoying cleanup. Pair it with my employers suddenly lopping 45 minutes off my regular shift and suffice to say it wasn't great fun. On my way home I was actually desperate to find my smile. I sat down on facebook (as most do) and saw one of my sisters online. Simaltaneously, I sent another sister a text while starting a chat with the former sister to ask how my other sisters were doing. See what I mean? Multi-sister multitasking. Come on. I rock at sisters.*

So we talked. I set up lunch with text sister while facebook sister let me know all about college and life and how she LIKES MY BLOG** and scriptures and all sorts of good stuff. And I realized something: I'd really lightened up. I was laughing, I was enjoying life, and most importantly, I was grinning. Obviously grinning.

So there's that. You didn't even realize you helped make my day, but you did. Thanks for helping me out. I love having a family sometimes, even if mine is a little bigger and harder to manage than most.

-Eli

*Is there anything more worthless to rock at than sisters? Well, maybe the ukulele. Unless you're THIS LITTLE GUY HOLY CRAP

Look at that guy GO. Sure he doesn't know the words but whatever!

** Apparently people actually like it. Who knew. Weird.